Do Not Make This Relationship Mistake If You're A Man

Introduction

One of the most common mistakes young men do when they get into a relationship is to start prioritizing the relationship over their goals. Everyone makes this mistake a moment or another, and here is why it's a problem.

As relationship is commonly prioritized in pop culture and medias, it's easy to believe that the key to happiness is a happy relationship. A shitty job, war and all of your problems can be solved if you get into a great relationship with someone you love.

However, in reality, it doesn't work like this. Don't get me wrong, I'm not asking to stop giving two cents about relationships. Relationships (I'm speaking about romantic relationship during this whole article of course) are absolutely incredible and an infinite source of joy... but you've got to admit that, it's not going to make you happy if you're not improving your life outside of it.

Often times people get complacent when they get a girlfriend, and so they start eating more and more unhealthy foods, they start making excuses and work less so they can see their girlfriends more often.

And in reality there is no good way or bad way, only ways that make you happy and/or better.

A lot of people prioritize spending time with their girlfriends instead of working on their projects, and this leads to people being unfulfilled, and spending low quality time with their girlfriends. They would probably be much better husbands/boyfriends if they did what they had to do before seeing their girlfriend and taking care of her.

Your goals will not achieve themselves. You've got to work hard on them. And if you prioritize time spent with your girlfriend, not once in a while but ALWAYS, then you're going to have a big problem, with yourself, your girl, the relationship as a whole and then, ultimately, your goals and your life.

Life is a game of prioritization. If you look at the idea of time, time doesn't really exist, it's a human metric. We don't have 24 hours in a day, since we don't even have days, we just have nothing, just.... infinity. Which, by the way, is another human creation.

But if we listen to the idea of "days" and we use the 24 hour metric to calculate it... it can become problematic because it's an easy way to find excuses. A lot of people say "I don't have time"... you have time... time is "infinite". What isn't infinite is prioritization. What truly causes you to "not have time" is not time itself, but it's the activities you chose to prioritize over one or another.

"I need to get back home early, I don't have time to work more!" = "I choose to prioritize my home life instead of working more!".

"I need to go to sleep, I can't work more!" = "I choose to prioritize my sleep instead of working more hours!".

It's as easy as this, change your paradigm and it'll change your life.

Work Harder

Stop prioritizing your relationships above everything else, and do not sacrifice your goals to get into a stable or good relationship. If a relationship requires of you to abandon your goals, it's often, by definition, not good for you. So, give it up if your partner isn't happy about this situation.

I'm not saying to constantly abandon your partner. Of course not. You should still spend dedicated time with your partner, and listen to their desires and accept them and love them for who they are. BUT, relationship is an add-on, or an essential part of your life, but it shouldn't be the priority over your own happiness and fulfillment.

Now, you can choose to prioritize relationship, if you're less masculine or if it's how you're happy, but for 90% of people, a good relationship isn't good enough for becoming their best selves and feeling truly fulfilled to their core.

Enjoy relationships. Enjoy going to dinners and dates with your girlfriend, spending late nights together, taking walks with her.... ENJOY these moments! But, ALWAYS FINISH YOUR WORK FIRST. Don't go meet your girlfriend if you've got on the consciousness that you've got work to do. Else, you'll be less mindful and present, and your girlfriend will probably feel it and you'll be elsewhere, not even enjoying the relationship and maybe even building resentment against her for things that are your fault.

Remember, 1 hour of real, undivided and loving attention, is equal to 8 hours of divided, weakened attention. A man who is full in presence and in breathing, embracing the moment and enjoying his woman's presence, whilst being fulfilled at his core by the work he produces, is much more charismatic, and a good man, and an enjoyable partner, and even a "sexy" partner to the eye of a woman, rather than one who's shallow breathing, not even there in the moment.

Have Balance

Now, balance is important. You can be more 60% work / 40% relationship or 80% work / 20% relationship, but find a balance that works for you and your partner long term. Work hard but rest well too. Don't let work consume your whole life. Still, enjoy walking around, thinking about the meaning of life, meeting your girlfriend, enjoying time together, etc etc.

Having a break once in a while is also crucial. Don't think you're a machine, this belief is false and it'll lead to you being overwhelmed by work and life in general. Breathe. Be conscious. Take walks in nature, spend time with your girlfriend, sometimes spend week-ends or vacations together. Go and do something fun, relax. Don't always spend your time working. Prioritize work 70% of the time, but have this incredible 30% relationship time that is crucial to maintain the relationship healthy and loving.

Make Moments Spent Together Memorable

Make the moments you both spend together memorable. Go for walks, relax together, speak about life, enjoy good times together, look deeply in her eyes and feel how much you love her. Spend a good time with her, really enjoy her presence and love her to her core, and then go back to what you need to do, some hours or days later.

Making the moments you spend together memorable and special also means offering flowers, gifts, or writing a small message or a card. It also means going to a nice place together, or be so loving and warm that your partner feels like an angel. The goal is to make every moment you spend together feel like deep love.

Be loving. Be masculine. And she'll be loving. And feminine.

Conclusion

Finally, thank you for reading. You should of course, in conclusion, prioritize your goals and your purpose above your relationship, and I'm saying this from the deepest of my soul, really prioritize what makes you truly happy and fulfilled first, so as to give her what she truly deserve.

Still spend dedicated time with your partner, and make those times truly special with gifts (not necessarily costing money, but a message, a poem, a letter, anything). Be passionately in love by not "depolarizing" each other like two magnets. Stay polarized. Attract each other and do not see each other too often.

Winning requires of you to make sacrifices and to prioritize things above others. So, choose wisely how you allocate your time. Time is finite on a human scale, and our life is ultimately a game of prioritization, from our first year to our last year. So, keep punching, and I'll see you next time. Bye.

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