"I'm so OCD" : No, you're not. Here is what OCD looks like

Introduction

« I’m so OCD », « Stop being so OCD dude », so many of these people think that OCD, or Obsessive Compulsive Disorder, is a disorder based on wanting perfection. They believe that someone having OCD is someone who uncontrollably starts to clean the room or do the dishes or wash their hands or some bullshit.

Now sure, OCD can cause these types of symptoms, and these symptoms form a few categories of OCD (cleanliness OCD, hygiene OCD, etc), but OCD isn’t defined by these symptoms.

To better understand OCD, or obsessive compulsive disorder, let’s break it down words by words.

First off, what is a disorder? A disorder, or in this case a mental disorder, is a sickness that disrupts normal mental functions (according to OCD-Uk). Therefore, a disorder affects your mental space: the way you process and use information, the way you think, the way you realize things, your identity, your beliefs, etc, etc. It can disrupt, hurt, change, and even challenge your strongest beliefs and values.

What does « obsessive » stands for in OCD? « Obsessive » refers to obsessive thoughts, images, unwanted feelings, beliefs, unwanted words or reactions or even groin responses that are NOT WANTED. Groinal responses are literally responses from your groin area, meaning your genitals. This can be arousal in the genital following an intrusive, negative, or hurtful thought. So, lubrication, erections, you got it.

In other words, obsessive is the cigarette which causes the entire forest to burn, it’s the trigger, the thought, the unwanted feeling.

Now, what does « compulsive » stands for in OCD? Compulsive stands for compulsions. Compulsions are the actions you take to make you feel better about your obsessions.

A very simple way to schematize this, is to look at it this way.

Obsession (cigarette) appears (falls to the ground) - challenges your beliefs, your values, « punch where it hurts » (such as a cigarette falling on herbs rather than sand, it immediately starts to burn because it’s the « fire weak point » of the forest) - you do a compulsion to feel better (by doing a compulsion, it helps you try to « feel » the right way, such as a feeling that helps you move on feeling like you have truth inside your heart or whatever).

In other words, OCD plays on your insecurities, on your fears and often times your deepest fears, and it also plays on the thing you hold the most important in your life, such as your friendships and relationships and children’s, in a way to hurt you. OCD is a way for people to complete their « doubt » about questions they either have never answered or can’t answer, not by simply believing their mind (because people with OCD often times don’t believe their minds) but by trying to « feel » right or have sensations because in OCD’s people minds, real-life reaction = way to verify the truth.

Let’s take pedophile OCD, or someone believing they are a pedophile. They might say « no, I’m not a pedophile » in their mind after having an intrusive thought or image or feeling. They are truly scared of being a pedophile. However, the anxiety and stress they build by the eventuality of « am I a pedophile », leads to them being confused about their feelings. Not being able to trust their mind, they check for « physical signs » because physical signs feel more concrete and real, like a concrete proof, that they are not a pedophile. Sadly, if they get a groin response (movement in the groin area for example, which can by the way be caused by anxiety), they will feel terrible thinking this is real proof, even tho it’s… not a concrete proof.

To conclude, OCD is a stress and anxiety disorder, designed to challenge your deepest values, your beliefs, and what you hold most important in life. It’s there to stress you into an illusion. Visiting a OCD-specialized therapist to do CBT (Cognitive Behavioral Therapy) or EPT (Exposure Prevention Therapy) is a good way to start. Speaking about it to friends or family members can become a compulsion in and of itself, but can help you realize that OCD is only an illusion.

Forums on diverse social media platforms and associations as well as articles and books can also be of help in your journey against obsessive compulsive disorder. Just know that you can recover 99% from OCD, and sometimes even 100%. It’s possible. So give it a try. Everyone has intrusive thoughts, yours are just either 1) worse because of your OCD, or 2) you put too much attention on them.

By the way, OCD is often caused by traumatic events, so you can work on that too. One of the only ways to truly beat OCD is to realize that your intrusive and/or unwanted thoughts and reactions are a 100% OUT OF YOUR CONTROL. Not 99%, 100%. So if they come and go like clouds, can you control clouds? No. So stop giving a fuck. It’s harder said than done, but when you realize that these thoughts are a 100% out for your control, and if you try to picture your thoughts outside of you, then you’ll be one step forward toward recovery.

Conclusion

I hope this article helped, and I’ll see you next time. Goodbye, and have a nice day. And also, thank you for reading, I appreciate it, and never give up, however hard it may be. Speak to people.

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